What does the word ‘FAT’ really mean?
So the summer is here, are you going on holiday? Fancy some new swimwear to go with some fancy sunglasses? Summer is the time we expose our bodies. The pictures are everywhere, billboards, posters, models with six-packs, toned, lean, perfectly formed bodies posing in every shop, at every magazine counter, in every position, not one extra ounce of flesh. Looking good is a billion dollar industry! Photographers airbrushing each inch of each photo so that it looks perfect, in every single way. Every sinew of the macho masculine body honed.
Celebrities pose as role models, fashion houses capitalizing on their fame to sell their goods. This billion-dollar industry has a lot to answer for when it comes to setting standards for the average guy! There is no fat here!
These pictures of total perfection are completely unrealistic, and far from reality. It’s a type of learnt behaviour. When people see these pictures in glossy magazines and on billboards they are identifying with what the image means and suggests. The images are suggesting success, money and fame, status and respect, power and control, and that this stems from projecting the perfect self-image. Again, this identification is completely impossible to attain, and far from the truth.
In their pursuit of this perfection grows the seeds of imperfection. The seeds of imperfection being unworthiness, a sense of failure, not being good enough, not looking good enough, not thin enough, too big, overweight, too FAT!
What Does Fat Really Mean?
But what does the word Fat really mean; it really means depression, dis-satisfaction, disappointment, anger, frustration, self loathing, lack of self-esteem, not being good enough, a feeling of being judged, compared, not fitting in, not looking the same as the guys in the pictures.
In seeking perfection people will often go to any lengths, including lipo-suction, plastic surgery, and even complete reconstructive surgery. Removal of ribs, taking fatty tissues from one area of the body, only to replace it somewhere else, seemingly more attractive. From the sublime to the ridiculous some people even becoming addicted to plastic surgery, suffering from body dysmorphia undertaking procedure after procedure in pursuit of perfection.
Not to mention those countless hours at the gym, often using steroids or other body building products to try to create an unnatural physique. Inevitably this can lead into a downward spiral of depression. Did you know when it comes to key problem areas, more than half of men (54%) dislike their stomachs, while one in seven (14%) wish they had bigger pecs!
Depression encompasses many negative feelings and negative self-talk plays over and over in the mind, bringing us further down with already low self-esteem.
According to a report recently published in the Huffington Post in a poll of 2,500 British men almost half, 48% said the desperately wanted to loose weight and 41% felt they needed to ‘tone-up’. Included in the survey as contributing factors were being the butt of their mate’s jokes, getting undressed in front of other men and feeling the need to live up to super fit celebrities and models as well as being compared to an ex-partner, or even a sibling, was also found to make men doubt their looks.
Feelings may even stem from childhood, children can be cruel, bullying, name calling or even a simple comment could be the start of a lifelong self-loathing journey.
So what is the solution to this huge dilemma. It’s not easy, it will take time and commitment. Learning to turn the mindset from external beauty to internal beauty, love and acceptance. Until we can reach that place, where we made need to face our fears which may require help, such as counseling, coaching or psychotherapy you will never have real peace.
The reality is, some people are taller, some people are shorter, bigger or smaller. Focus on having a healthy body that is nurtured, fed, rested and respected will bring you greater satisfaction and help to grow your self-esteem.
It is time to accept yourself for who you are, as you are, to achieve a truly happy, healthy and balanced life.