Being an alpha male isn’t as easy as you think. You can’t just hit the gym, start dressing in fancy clothes, or hit on women and have anyone believe you’re an alpha male.
Alpha male qualities are learned and earned with hard work and effort. When you hear alpha male, if you think of a rude, overbearing guy who always pushes himself and what he wants onto others, that’s not an alpha male. That’s just a jerk.
If you think you’ve got the makings of an alpha male, read on to learn more about what it takes to inspire jealousy from other men and genuine interest from women.
What Is an Alpha Male?
Not just anyone can be an alpha male. It takes time and dedication, as well as understanding the real traits of an alpha male. These traits are as follows:
- Being assertive and direct
- Honest and dependable
- Having initiative and growth
- Showing kindness and consideration
You might be wondering how some of these alpha traits work into making a man who leads in his life and charms all the ladies, without being a poser or tryhard. These are all part of being a real alpha male.
Being Assertive and Direct
You’ll notice the word “assertive” instead of aggressive or dominant. That’s intentional. Assertion implies confidence and self-assurance.
Develop a Strong Sense of Self-Belief
If you know yourself and what you want, you have no problem taking charge of a room. It’s up to you to cultivate your belief in yourself, although you can turn to outside sources for inspiration or guidance.
Ultimately, it’s what you believe about yourself and how you act because of this. If you put on a show of what you think it means to be confident, people will see you as a fake and arrogant person.
You won’t have to justify yourself to others, nor will you have to compete simply because you feel threatened. You’ll feel less threatened because you’re already taking your world by storm. This usually sends a clear message to other alpha males to stay out of your way.
Part of believing in yourself comes from celebrating your accomplishments and honestly looking at what you can do, what you are capable of doing, and what you think you need to improve. The best way for you to build alpha male characteristics in yourself is to tackle them head-on.
A direct approach means you’re honest with yourself, both in your shortcomings and strengths.
Honest and Dependable
The kind of honesty you’ll see in an alpha male is the kind that allows him to grow from his mistakes, but also get him that promotion at work.
It’s the kind of honesty that warrants feedback that helps him grow. And if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll be dependable, too. Nothing’s more reliable than the truth.
Honesty and dependability build trust in every part of a man’s life: his workplace, family or friends, and home life. As an alpha male, your assertiveness and directness will be taken far more seriously if you’re known to be trustworthy.
Dependable alpha males show up in every part of their lives. They show up to not just fill a seat, but to excel. The self-confidence you have as an alpha male, as well as always showing up, means promotions at work and the attention of women.
Who doesn’t want that?
Initiative and Growth
Being assertive because you believe in yourself is one thing, but having the honesty to recognize your flaws takes a whole other level of effort.
True alpha male qualities take the initiative to grow. Alpha males know they’re not perfect, and they don’t let them get that down.
Instead, they focus on what they know they need to fix. Because they’re honest with themselves and dependable, they can count on the goals they set being ones they can reach to be their best selves.
You can do the same, too, if you’re assertive with yourself. Taking the initiative means repeatedly acting on your assertions and self-confidence. It also means swallowing your pride, even when you’re struggling to perform in certain spaces of your life.
Having a hard time in the bedroom is more common than men think. Alpha males don’t let this stop them. Instead, they address issues like these with a problem-solving mindset, which comes from a place of the initiative.
If you’re unhappy with something in your life, you work to change it. Or, you accept things as they are if there’s no possible way to change them (i.e., your height ). This initiative doesn’t come from just anywhere, but the hard work you put into yourself to stay motivated.
Kindness and Consideration
Alpha males aren’t just confident and assertive. How do you think they charm ladies honestly, and so well?
Sure, they’re honest, but being truthful about yourself with others is just as hard as not lying to yourself about who you are. When you’re honest with another person, you’re considerate.
The best relationships in an alpha male‘s life come from careful consideration. No woman wants to be with a fake alpha male who uses her and doesn’t care about her, any more than any workplace team wants a guy who asserts himself over the benefit of the group.
Alpha males put themselves first, sure, but not all of the time. They know when to lead and when to follow. Usually, this has them leading because of their initiative, honesty, dependability, and consideration. There’s a reason top leaders are alpha males.
Real Change Takes Courage
Being an alpha male isn’t easy, but the best things in life never are. There’s a reason alpha males take the leap from safe, secure, and comfortable and dare to stand out.
Courage can be scary, but if you face it honestly and take the initiative to assert yourself, you will build the self-assurance of an alpha male.
Being courageous is not being fearless, but having the confidence in yourself and your abilities to face the things you’re scared of—whether it’s inside or outside of yourself.
The world recognizes real courage and true alpha males. They stand out from the crowd for a reason, because they earned it, just like you can if you’re willing to work on cultivating alpha male characteristics in you.
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