What Questions Should You Ask on a First Date so as not to Appear Trivial? A simple scheme that will make the conversation more interesting.

There are a lot of tips on the Internet, but usually, they are divided into two categories: template questions about hobbies, family, work, and markedly unusual ones. For example, what a person would first take with him or her to an uninhabited island.

The problem is that the first type of questions is boring. People get tired of talking about the same thing over and over again. Especially if they often go on dates. And the second ones may give the impression that you are speaking according to a prepared scenario, or even seem inappropriate. Therefore, it is best to combine them. You can use them on the offline date or dating service  this is exactly what the authors of The Art of Manliness blog, Brett and Kate McKay, advised to do. They composed the formula “standard question + interesting additional questions” and shared examples.

Date

Standard question: Where are you from?

Additional questions:

Was it interesting to live there? What do you recommend visiting in your hometown?

As a child, did you want to move to another place?

Are there any other places where you feel at home?

 

Standard question: Do you have brothers and sisters?

Additional questions:

How do you differ from brothers and sisters? Which of your relatives do you have the closest relationship with?

What was your role in the family?

Who did you consider: a child prodigy, a good kid, a rebel, or maybe someone who reconciles everyone?

 

Standard question: Why did you move to this city?

Additional questions:

What were your ideas about life here before moving? What turned out to be completely unlike expectations?

What do you like the most here?

What at first did not suit you very much, but then you liked it?

Is there any minus that you will never get used to?

 

Standard question: Where did you study?

Additional questions:

Did university studies coincide with your childhood expectations?

Don’t you regret your attitude to study?

What do you miss most from that time?

When it became clear in what area you want to specialize?

Is your work related to a specialty?

Do you keep in touch with school and university friends?

How did you meet your best friend?

What your changes would most surprise your classmates now?

What do you think is the hardest part about growing up?

Do not ask one question after another.

Do not ask one question after another. Tell something about yourself, answer the questions of the interlocutor. According to scientists, people prefer those who share information rather than behave secretly. But note: if your interlocutor speaks exclusively about oneself, this is an alarming bell.

And do not forget, although your questions should be interesting, they should not require much thought. The interlocutor will feel stupid if it takes a long time to gather the thoughts before answering.

So try to ask yourself a question first. If you are pleased to reflect on it and you are ready to answer quickly, feel free to ask the person you are talking to.